I wish I could tell you how I really feel. I’m used to concealing my feelings no matter how heavy they are. I used to love the pain. No, I didn’t ignore the pain, in fact, I embraced it. But this time, one of those rare moments, I just don’t know how to handle it anymore. I just want to blow. I need to let this out, but there’s no sense in doing so if you’re not telling it to the person you have an issue with. Which actually makes it worse, because I don’t have the courage to confront that person. I’ll feel guilty if I do. Thus, I always resort to just keeping it all to myself.
I always end up as if I’m the bad person, which is not the case. I am the one being oppressed and stepped on here.
I wish I could just one day not give a damn to what others might feel just as long I could let this all out.