I want to tell you the certainty about what I really think of you, but somehow, you always manage to make me feel mortified as if I’m rude for even having such sentiments. So I constantly end up keeping the whole shebang to myself while enduring the pain I could no longer get a grip on.
I know that if you truly love someone you could see past his failures, but how? How am I supposed to see through those when all you do is blatantly show me the kind of being you actually are.

“Focus on me -tree”

I lay beneath an inert tree

As I feel the gust of wind surge through me

The sun demanded for my attention

I felt its heat on my bare foot, with permission …

 

It’s a tree no more

Lost its beauty, unlike before

The flowers sway with poise over the prairie

Its splendor I can compare to thee …

 

The tree is dying

Yet it gives me shade … at least trying

What’s o’er the horizon?

Nothing … oh, there goes a falcon

 

The tree caresses me with its last fern

I thought of having it burned

Then I dismissed the thought

Its battle, it fought.

Reminders to self.

Reminders to self.

What do you do when you’re feeling like you’re about to blow up? When the pressure is rising? When the the stress are just unbearable? What do you do?

Whenever I feel like I’m about to snap, I check my laptop’s wallpaper, then read these notes I made for myself.

Absolute happiness.

Keep swimming no matter how strong the current is…
Keep moving no matter how rough the road is…
Keep looking no matter how dark the day is….
Keep smiling even though there’s no more reason to…
Keep loving even after being broken a thousand times…

Faith is absolute when you’ve been through hell, but you still managed to find your way to heaven.
Hope is absolute when you’ve lost everything, but you still found reasons to believe.
Courage is absolute when you’ve experienced your worst nightmares, but you’re still able to conquer those fears.
Love is absolute when you’re left broken and empty, but you still forgave those who crashed you.

Every one of us has his own flaws; heartaches; insecurities; and fears. Each one of us has experienced heartaches; lost; struggles; and defeat.
None of us is exempted from these hardships in life.
What makes us different from each other is how we deal with these obstacles.
Do you let these things bury you deeper into the ground?
Or do you fight, and make your way to the top?

I am nothing without him

I am nothing without him

This boy means more than the world to me.
What am i without him?
Nothing.

I’m not a perfect mom, but I try really hard to give him everything.

I may not give him all the things he WANTS, but I try to give him everything he NEEDS.

Above all, I try hard enough to make him feel that I love him that much.

He’s my boss. He’s my savior. He’s my everything. He’s my life.

What am I without him?
Nothing.

Stings like a bee

I’ve had enough of you. 
I can’t stand the sound of your voice. 
Another word from you and that will be the end of me. 

I tried not to listen to you. 
But you’re just too good in making noise. 
Now that I’ve open up my eyes, I could see. 

The wound on my skin is far more bearable 
than the wound you’ve caused my heart. 
These cuts sting like a bee 
but it makes me, Me. 

I’d love to get away from this town 
so that I won’t see you ever again 
I hope that this will be over. 

How low do you have to push me down? 
I can’t stay like this, I’ll go insane. 
There’s just no more room for cover. 

I want to go to the moon where you can’t reach me 
There, I’d stay forever alone but happy 
And life would be filled with rainbows and butterflies 

These cuts it makes me, Me. 
I love the pain it gives me even if it stings like a bee. 

I kissed her

I kissed her wounds ’til it healed.
I kissed her tears ’til it dried.
I kissed her heart ’til it was fixed.
I kissed her scars ’til it faded.
I kissed her all night…

until I woke up, and found out I was dreaming.

Inspire me. I wanna write.

Inspire me. I wanna write.
Impress me. I wanna smile.

Love me. I wanna die.
Comfort me. I wanna cry.

Hate me. I wanna fight.
Stop me. I wanna try.

Help me. I wanna live.
Take me. I wanna be.

Hold me. I wanna fly.
Push me. I wanna fall.